A Paramount Exploration of Self

• Exploring yourself can be a very tricky task but only as difficult as you make it. Have patience with yourself.

WHO ARE YOU WHEN NOBODY'S WATCHING

What a scary thing to do for some of us because the truth is that some of us have knowingly neglected ourselves. Caught up in getting to know everything about everyone else in our circle; forgetting yourself along the way. It's not until age starts to creep up ON US that we get a little wiser and look up long enough to realize that time did not wait on you.

Many of us fail to invest the time in ourselves needed to understand self on a deeper, more personal and passionate level. There are so many avenues of self exploration and we will touch on a few because just like our mind can't think of just one thing in a day neither can we when we are planning our journey towards self growth and self understanding.

The challenge for you is to take the time to look back on your life, forward to your current and fast forward to your potential future and ask yourself if you are satisfied with you. Eventually everyone comes to a reflective stage in their life.

Our mind may begin to race with questions:

We wonder if we are on the right path towards our personal life goals and yes it is easier for some than others; so there will be that few that stand strong and tall while they pound on their chest answering their own question "YES, i am a success and everything in my life is perfect".

Leaving you to wonder if their sense of perfection could be true, while some others may be saying yes sort of!!! or kinda!!! and there will be that few that are in the figuring out stage just like you and I; who may feel like there is still something missing in their life which sends them on a full speed race towards that search for self discovery. Which is GREAT for the person in search of a better and more productive them.

PEOPLE, PLACES, & THINGS

My mother told me on many occasions that if i were looking for different results in my life than i would need to change the people, places and things that I surrounded myself with. You can't possibly expect to do the same things and get different results.

As i began to reflect back on those words and found that once we actually get the gist of "people, places and things" we might begin to look a little closer at the people that we allow into our circle.

Some of us may even begin to wonder if those people that we have allowed in our life is deserving of being in your company, in your space, in your face, on your phone, emailing you, interrupting your day, texting you.

Some of us may even ask:

Do they deserve to be in your company? Are you giving up time that can't be given back and is it worth it to you? Are the people that you keep company with good for your life long term or not? Lot's of question huh.

It's normal for questions to flood your mind when you are figuring out if a person is worth your time or a piece of your life. More Questions: Can they come to the table with you? Are they givers or are they takers? Are they stuck in a year that drives you insane? so many questions! But if you don't ask the questions for yourself than who will ask them for you?

People are not always transparent.

If you don't ask they

don't tell!!!

Nothing Comes to a Sleeper but a Dream

As we are in the midst of exploring ourselves we are undeniably going to think about our careers and with that we may also wonder if our hobbies can be anything more than hobbies. Especially once you see some of the bold souls in your circle that have shown strong enough to take a chance on themselves by stepping out and turning their passion, their hobbies into real life business adventures. Some people are so afraid of not getting it perfect that they will fail to try.

It's not easy to go out on your own but how will you know unless you try. If the first go around results in a big zero than regroup and learn from your mistakes but please don't get discouraged on the first go around. It takes courage to keep going when doors get slammed in your face.

I am suggesting that you explore your hobbies or the things that you love however i am not suggesting that you explore those hobbies at the expense of real life and ignore the responsibilities that come along with having a real life job that pays real life money for your real life living expenses because life is not free.

I'm in no way trying to be a dream thief but while i tell you to chase your dreams i must also remind you that real life comes first and your hobbies and dreams are just that if they do not bring in any income so please be realistic and conquer your hobbies and passions on your off time in the meantime.

People make time for the things and the people that are important to them.

Let's Play a Game

Work on becoming a more disciplined you; think of it like a fun game. The adventure of life can only be as easy as you make it once you gain some sense of control.

Rules of the game: In order to play you must understand that ultimately the game is you making a commitment to yourself.

- First, we will start off slowly by putting away a dime a day.

- Second, take ten minutes to give yourself a piece of you back.

- Third, go, think of, be, do whatever you want to do for those ten minutes. It's all yours.

- Lastly, raise the amount of dimes that you set aside so that you know that you are also setting aside that time for you to get to know you.

Winning the Game: By continually gaining knowledge of self

Remember that you are the prize at the end of the game!!!!!

People can EASILY become addictions

Many of us are comfortable with welcoming a pleasurable distraction, someone in your life that loves you and will allow you to focus on them rather than yourself but please stop and understand that at the end of the day you still stand alone and will need to be able to sit with yourself without the distractions of someone else's life.

You want to be able to function without distractions because if that safety net that you find in your mate suddenly becomes unavailable in your time of need what will you do? Will you be able to function? Will you run and jump off the roof because you feel alone or will you find something or someone to busy yourself with? Learning to love yourself without those around you to solidify your importance or to validate your importance in life should be a goal if you are the personality type that depends on others approvals. Learn that you are the one that needs to approve of yourself. Seeking the worlds approval is like a fairyland dream, so save yourself the stress.

In your search you may feel emptiness

Our minds start that race again when that feeling of emptiness creeps in and that's why i suggest that we get to know ourselves without the diversions attached in order to combat that feeling of lonesomeness. Many of us grow co dependent on others and in their absence we can't function.

A tiny example: Not being able to sleep if your mate is not next to you; I say start practicing because everything that you do well takes practice.

Don't be guilty of self sabotage. Give your body the sleep it needs and deal with your mate and their reasoning for their absence later.

Time is not waiting for you to catch up

Some people live their lives content with redirecting their focus from themselves to others. This is called a diversion. It may seem easier to focus on others rather than yourself but this is how people take themselves for granted to later feel owed. I say get to know yourself and then teach others how you expect to be treated. If you don't learn to understand your value than you may live to regret it once you learn how much of yourself, how much of your worth, how much of your value that you have given away at no cost to the outside with a huge balance for you mentally.

I am not judging either way because it took me some time to know the me that I am today and that was no easy feat with my creating so many versions of myself. I almost lost myself in the multiple selves that i took on. So i am sharing this with you in order to lead you away from the self destruction that makes you run from the you that you are. Ultimately you would want to face yourself in good form or in bad it's still you. The goal is to not run but to address and if needed to make changes. If you are not at a happy place in your life than stand up, look in the mirror and make a conscious decision that you will take control over your life and make changes that will benefit you in today's day as well as tomorrow's day.

A reminder: You are the leading woman/man on your stage and in your movie. Understanding that is a step towards your journey into self exploration.

In today's society the level of acceptance has made us comfortable with looking outward rather than looking inward for the answers to the why's and how's in our life. Pointing the finger or placing the blame is an easier excuse than just looking in the mirror to figure out how you may have contributed to your unhappiness. The fairy tale books paint a pretty picture but in real life you may find that excuses will cross your path as to why another person is not happy or heck you might be the one making the excuses as to why you are not happy but as i mentioned earlier the trick in it all is to understand the things in life that makes you happy first.

- Think about who you are and what you want in your life today. What you may want may be different than it was a few days, weeks or years back.

- Excuses are just that, excuses.

- Looking outward for the answer is not the answer.

- Look at yourself and love yourself enough to get to know the woman/man you are inside.

Time to focus on the prize YOU BE-LOVED ARE THE PRIZE

Sharing is caring, maybe when you find out what makes you happy you can share that with your mate and take the guessing out of the game.

DEFINITIONS

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PARAMOUNT

par·a·mount

adjective

1. more important than anything else; supreme.

synonyms: most important, of greatest importance, of prime importance, of supreme importance;

uppermost, supreme, chief, overriding, predominant, cardinal, foremost, first and foremost, prime, primary, principal, preeminent, highest, utmost, main, key, central, leading, major, top, topmost, dominant; informal number-one.

EXPLORATION

ex·plo·ra·tion

noun

1. the action of traveling in or through an unfamiliar area in order to learn about it.

thorough analysis of a subject or theme. synonyms: investigation, study, survey, research, search, inspection, probe, examination, inquiry, scrutiny, observation; consideration, analysis, review, anatomy.EndFragment

VALUE

val·ue

noun

noun: value; plural noun: values

1. the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.

synonyms: merit, worth, usefulness, use, utility, practicality, advantage, desirability, benefit, gain, profit, good, service, help, helpfulness, assistance, effectiveness, efficacy, avail, importance. significance.

DIVERSION

di·ver·sion

noun

1. an instance of turning something aside from its course.

synonyms: rerouting, redirection, turning aside, deflection, digression, deviation, divergence, entertainment, amusement, recreation, pastime, game, hobby

1. an activity that diverts the mind from tedious or serious concerns; a recreation or pastime.

Blessings and Bests

Precious Unique

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